Clever Branding

Whenever I have family round, which I did on Sunday, I always buy a carton of Innocent Fruit Smoothie. It's for the kids, but not really.

The drinks are yummy, though not cheap. The cartons are very clever - they are witty, often carry jokey comments and give the impression of beguiling innocence.

Of course I don't expect the folk at "Fruit Towers" (I kid you not) to be all folksey and sucking on straw. I suspect that, to the contrary there are some very clever minds, outsourced product suppliers and a not insignificant marketing budget.

As I was squashing down the empty carton just now, I noticed that the latest bright idea is to print a secret code on the side . Entering that code on a website means that a tree is then planted on your behalf. It's all jolly clever - if over time the 'tree count' below changes, it will show that the Innocent people have mastered technology as well as making yummy drinks (and probably lots of money as well).

A superb example of successful branding.

Fruit Towers is actually in Shepherds Bush in West London- still at least they are nearer to Goldhawk Road station (Hammersmith and City Line) than to the currently closed Shepherds Bush Central Line station at the far end of Shepherds Bush Green.

It's warm down there

Yesterday afternoon the Bakerloo Line had 'minor' delays due to signalling problems at Queens Park. This morning (as at 06:30) the problems have moved down the line a bit to Baker Street.

You can check the departure boards for Baker Street here, to gauge whether things have got any better by the time you read this.

What I can say is that it is going to be jolly uncomfortable down there today. Today's weather is forecast to be hot and sunny, a little warmer than yesterday. I know that the British definition of hot is not the same as in some other parts of the world, but nevertheless I can vouch for the fact that the Bakerloo Line was sweltering yesterday. It is likely to be just as bad today.

It is probably a good idea to heed the official advice - carry a bottle of water with you. I'm still tending towards tube avoidance, so walking today will probably raise my temperature just as much as entering the underground furnace.

Be careful out there.

Voyeurism in Reverse

One of the things that I find fascinating about this blog is the nature of the vistors to it and, particularly, how they get here and whereabouts they are.

I had a first this morning - a vistor from Zimbabwe. Specifically their ISP is said to be located in "Mashonaland Central", which apparently is in the North of the country. Whoever you are/ were: Welcome!

Given the current problems in Zimbabwe and the tight control over many aspects of the media, I suspect that one has to take some news items with a pinch of salt. However a quick skim through the headlines of a Google News Search shows the dreadful state that the people are in. Can you imagine living somewhere where you are sentenced to 6 months in prison for organising a political meeting?

What is reassuring is that this morning's vistor was 'normal' enough to be visiting the most popular post on this blog. Quite why an innocuous article about steam trains should be read so much is quite beyond me.

Using the phone when on a train

Would all users of mobile phones please note the following:

• Rule 1. All mobile phones are fitted with very sensitive microphones. If you cannot hear the person on the other end, shouting will not make any difference. Do Not Shout.

• Rule 2. Some trains on the National Rail network have 'Quiet Zones'. If you sit in one of these areas, it really is quite simple. Turn your phone off if you are sitting in a designated Quiet Zone. The world is not going to stop spinning on its axis if you are temporarily unable to make or receive calls. The alternatives are to (a) sit somewhere else or (b) stand by the doors, but always remember Rule 1.

• Rule 3. Mobile phones do not work in tunnels, unless very short.If you are traveling on the London Underground this will generally be a concept with which you are familiar. If you are on the phone and you lose your signal while it has 'suddenly' gone dark outside, you have probably gone into a tunnel. Do not try to use your phone in a tunnel. Banging your phone sharply on a hard surface or shouting "Hello, Hello, Hello" into the phone will not, by itself, alter the fact that you are now de facto in a Mobile Free Zone. Should you already have been breaking Rule 1 or Rule 2, your fellow passengars will each be breathing a sigh of relief at this stage.

• Rule 4. Swearing is not clever, nor is it a sign of intelligence. Swearing in public demonstrates an absolute lack of consideration for others and many find it offensive. Do not swear in public. With very few exceptions, the amount a person swears is inversely proportional to their IQ. Unfortunately anyone who breaks this rule probably doesn't even understand Rule 1, Rule 2 or Rule 3.

• Rule 5. If you are unable to comply with Rule 1, Rule 2, Rule 3 or Rule 4, then please walk.

Please note that the events leading to the publishing of these rules are not fictitious. Any similarity to real life events, or references to the behaviour of any person living or dead, is totally none-coincidental and probably deliberate.

Toilet Talk

The new gents toilets at Marylebone Station have opened.

I think they opened a few days ago, but I only found them this morning.

The new facilities are slightly further away from the centre of the concourse than was previously the case, though presumably this means that the ladies will be much enlarged once the refurbishment is complete. They can be found just past the Etsu Cafe and opposite the cheese shop.

The highlight? A row of Dyson Airblade hand dryers.

Oh, the things that make me happy....

Later: Less than 90 minutes after publishing this post, my blog had a visit from the people at Dyson. It's probably a good thing I didn't say anything bad!

Birthdays all round

It's a popular week for birthdays:

• Tuesday: Station Supervisor
• Wednesday: Central User
• Friday: Ian P (who I first met on the way to Venezuela in 1997 and who hosted a reunion for us on the south coast at the weekend). Thank you.
  
• Sunday: Julie P (wife of Ian) who was super-organised and a great hostess. Julie had two Grandchildren when we arrived and three when we left, so there were plenty of distractions.

Happy Birthday to the three who aren't me.

In terms of the weekend, I went by car. The best I could manage on public transport was this ferry, which has to be the least formal mode of public transport I have been on in the UK. Happy days.

Oh, and we did drop one of our party off at Chichester station to travel back to Yorkshire by train. I cannot speak for the whole journey, but the Southern train to Victoria departed spot on time.

The ripple effect

There has been a building on fire this morning in South Molton Street, close to Bond Street tube station. The fire was reported in the early hours and was under control by 05.54am.

This means that Bond Street station is closed at present and neither the Central Line nor the Bakerloo Line are stopping.

The closure* will lead to elongated routes for many (Bond Street is a surprisingly busy station) - journeys out to Canary Wharf are particularly painful anyway for those changing from the Central Line, due to ongoing interchange difficulties at Bank.


*As always, I should point out that this blog is not a 'live travel service'. I recommend you use alternative sources of data for up-to-date information.

Chiltern Railways Timetable - It Does What It Says On The Tin

I can tell that quite a few people reach this blog looking for public transport information.

Sometimes it's weird and wonderful routes (often repeated) and sometimes, like many people, I think 'How did Google dish that one up?'.

Anyhow, a recurring theme is the Chiltern Railways timetable. Chiltern Railways run from London Marylebone to High Wycombe, Princes Risborough, Aylesbury (and other stations in Buckinghamshire), Birmingham and Stratford-Upon Avon, to name but a few.

Rather than host the document myself, here is a link to Chiltern Railways' timetable page. The full timetable is a pdf at the foot of the page, but there are other options dotted around.

Damn - I've Been Rumbled

I really am a silly sod!

A few days ago I'd sort of made an informal commitment to pop in to say hello to the Station Supervisor on my way home from work. It would have been sensible to have blogged about a thing or two during the last few but no... muggins here walked straight into it...

SS was very pleasant about it. Paraphrasing slightly, I think the the comment was along the lines of "Yeah, I'd noticed you hadn't been posting so much". Ouch.

London Underground Life has just passed the 100,000 hit mark, against my paltry nearly 10,000 hits. Congratulations on this significant milestone.

There is of course one major reason for the difference in blog traffic and that is content. Content is King.

If The Sun or The Mirror decided they occasionally couldn't be bothered to print a newspaper, they would over time lose their readers. It's the same for a blog - if you don't type, regular readers wither and disappear. Write regularly, and about things that people are interested in or can relate to, then repeat visitors and referrals grow exponentially.

So John, first of all thank you for offering to meet up. It was good to say hello to you and your colleague. Secondly, thank you for your kind comments. Thirdly, now that my (pc) problems appear to be out of the way, I shall endeavour to try a bit harder!

Why has this post got a logo? 'Cos that's what it looked like to me!

So what's going on here then?

I thought my eyes were deceiving me earlier today.

There I was, stood on the platform at Princes Risborough, when a Virgin Super Voyager train whizzed through. Eh? Has Chiltern Railways had an upgrade? There have since been loads more or these trains go through, so I thought I'd best find out what is going on.

Apparently the West Coast main line is closed at Rugby and a 'freight only' line somewhere in North West London is being used to get trains from Euston onto the Chiltern Railways lines.

Later: I've also just found a more recent Virgin Trains press release. Oh - And you can tell that I know nothing about trains. Until corrected, this post had the wrong sort of train (and wrong picture). Oops.

And a few grey hairs later

Sorry about the break.

The last month has seen me remember far more about the workings of my PC than I knew I'd forgotten.

The purchase of a Memory Stick and an external Firewire enabled hard drive have meant that the only data I seem to have lost has been my Outlook information (everything). No photos lost, no music lost, MS Money file protected. All in all lucky, lucky, lucky.

Oh, and the Bar Stewards at Adobe won't reissue my Dreamweaver activation code despite having the CD and access to my original on-line invoice. Gits.

So, one completely re-formatted hard drive later and I'm gradually getting back to normal.

Yippee.

I'd better go and cut the grass now. Chanting as I go ..... "Back up your data, back up your data, back up your d...

Houston - We have a problem

My home PC has gone the way of the Dodo, so I'll be back when I can.

A boffin at work is sorting me a bootable Linux disk which may enable me to recover files etc before contemplating serious action. No point worrying - just hope I can get my MS Money file back.

Ho hum.

No tubes or trains till Tuesday. Enjoy!

Back on topic

I've hardly mentioned the Central Line recently, so to totally get back on topic why not have a look at this song.. it made me smile:

Tube Avoidance - Progress Report

Since a particular post last month, I have managed to significantly reduce my usage of deep-level tube lines. This isn't because I dislike traveling on the Underground (far from it), it is simply to avoid becoming over anxious.

My alternative journey between work and London Marylebone involves a walk from Soho up to Great Portland Street, followed by a bus or sometimes one stop on the tube along to Baker Street.

Morning journeys via this route ('door to door') take about the same time as my old route. Evening journeys take about five minutes longer than was previously the case, but I feel a lot better for it.

Unsung Heroes

Rotary is a worldwide organisation, with widely different levels of understanding and standing in the communities in which it operates.

In Cornwall, the Rotary Club of Helston-Lizard runs a scheme called Shelterbox which aims to provide urgent relief around the globe when natural disasters occur.

I quote from the Shelterbox website regarding the immediate response to the Cyclone Disaster that struck Burma (Myanmar) over the weekend:

"May 6th - Myanmar (Burma): ShelterBox responds immediately to the devastating cyclone to hit Myanmar. 22,000 lives are reported to have been lost and 95% of houses are destroyed as the cyclone swept in-land after several days at sea. 224 boxes left from the pre-positioned site in Dubai over the weekend, 220 boxes have left from Melbourne, Australia and a further 200 boxes with two tents each were packed this morning at the ShelterBox HQ in Helston, Cornwall. A team of four SRT members are making arrangements to assist with the difficult distribution of vital aid."

A number of things strike me:

• The speed of response
• The fact that ShelterBoxes are pre-positioned around the globe
• This is done by a voluntary organisiation that, in the UK, has an image of wrinkly doddery old farts. Clearly nothing could be further from the truth.

A quick review shows that Shelterbox distributed over thirteen thousand boxes in the aftermath of the South-East Asian Tsunami three years ago. Please explore the ShelterBox website and learn just how good some people can be.

Shelterbox team - I salute you. Why not give them a few quid? Thank you.

A new railway is born

With a minimum of fanfare (I have seen no publicity), today a new railway company was born.

Wrexham & Shropshire started running passenger services today. Trains do what they say on the tin - offering a direct service from Wrexham & Shropshire to London Marylebone.

Currently the timetable has five return trains on each weekday, four on a Saturday and three on a Sunday.

Train politics mean that you cannot get on a train from Banbury to Marylebone (or from Marylebone to Banbury) - you have to use Chiltern Railways services instead.

I wish the new venture well - any new service has to be welcomed.

Trains have been running empty for a month for driver and route training, so hopefully today's niggles will soon be ironed out. There were unfortunately a couple of serious delays today, but I doubt that many people were affected.

Alternative career choice looming for train driver?

I was waiting at Princes Risborough train station this afternoon for a fast train to London (one stop only en-route, at High Wycombe).

Out of the Aylesbury branch line there suddenly appears a rubbish train which I know is heading for the WLWA Transfer Station in South Ruislip.

"Uh-Oh" me thinks - my train is going to catch that up.

Sure enough just as we are adjacent to Ruislip Gardens Central Line station my Chiltern Railways "Clubman" service grinds to a halt. It transpires that the waste train has suffered some kind of technical hitch while entering the siding and is blocking the points and the main line in towards Marylebone.

Driver: ".... the rubbish train is blocking our path and we can't get around it, maybe that's why they call it the rubbish train".

Maybe you had to be there, but the whole carriage cracked up. Definitely a comedian in the waiting.

Anyhow, we soon got moving and arrived only 7 minutes late into Marylebone.

In the manner of a Hedgehog

Eh?

Bloody stupid name.

Erinaceous.

Cute to look at from a distance with but prickly to handle.

Ancient history for me but a big worry for a while. Gone.

Sorry to talk in riddles.

Do I have 'Gullible' stamped on my forehead?

I switch on my PC, it goes through the normal warm-up routine. Mailwasher launches.

While I am out of the room the normal couple of dozen spam emails are deleted.

Three are left:

• One from the "Executive Governor, Cent. Bank Of Nig" offering to courier me USD 10 M in cash.
• Another from "OFFICE OF THE SENATE HOUSE
• FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA" apologising for the delay in sending a different wire transfer to me for USD 11.3 M
• and the third from a named individual simply described as 'The Legal Representative'. This man purports to be a barrister distributing the assets of a dead person. This offer is low at only USD 5 M.

Wow! That's USD 26.3 M waiting for me in Nigeria, all in the last eight hours. I am so excited. Not.

The most worrying thing is not that I am particularly gullible (my job ensures that I receive regular Fraud Prevention and Anti-Money Laundering Training), but that the scammers have managed to get as far as the penultimate wall of my anti-spam armoury.

Fortunately I just see the words and smile. They sit in a benign environment on a preview screen in Mailwasher and I simply hit 'Process' and then they are gone.

Empty screen. Till the next...

Edit: I haven't even finished proof reading this post and another one has arrived. This time it's a paltry USD 1.3 M. Change of country - this one is from Benin. Grrr.

What do we expect from 'A Good Service is Operating on ....'

Some time in my pre-blogging days, London Underground changed its house style so that a 'Normal Service' became a 'Good Service'.

This means that when you are stood on a packed platform at Oxford Circus desperately hoping that, if you fold yourself in half and leap over the heads of 25 people stood by the door on the next train to gain access, you are safe in the knowledge that this isn't just Normal but it is actually rather Good.

This linguistic nuance bothered me when the change occurred and it still grates a little.

Yesterday morning the Southbound Bakerloo Line platform at Marylebone was absolutely heaving, such that I eventually managed to squeeze onto the second train that arrived, and that was after going to the very last door. All the while we were breezily being told by the public address system that this was 'Good'.

The Eastbound Central Line platform at Oxford Circus was worse - this time I had to let two trains through despite, as instructed using 'The Full Length of the Platform'. At least there was a man there making the announcements rather than an automaton.

For a long time last year the Inner-London part of my journey involved a bus or tube along the Marylebone/ Euston Road to the The Station Supervisor's territory, then a meander down through Fitzrovia to Soho. I think I shall have to revert to it, as my current journey is not good for the soul.